Oidhche Shamhna

Scotland has traditionally celebrated Samhain, a festival with roots in Ireland, on October 31. Much like Halloween in the States, children get dressed up and go about the neighborhood 'guising,' stopping by each house and offering up some form of entertainment in the hopes of receiving a treat in return.

This Halloween, the lovely ladies and lads of Team Glasgow decided to do a little guising of their own. The result: comedy gold.

[Note: I'll try to keep narration to a minimum in this post for two reasons: 1) I feel the photos themselves attest to this group's caliber better than any silly platitudes I could offer; and 2) I'm pretty stinking bushed. Thanks a lot, multiple fire alarms in the single-digit evening air.]

Miss Audrey Hepburn (Whitney) and the librarian (Yours Truly) kicking off the festivities. Props to Whitney for setting up an amazing little gathering, replete with all the seasonal trimmings. (For those of you wondering as to the title of my prop book, it's Thomas Hobbes's Leviathan. Political philosophy for the win!)

(Left to right) Kara, Jenna, Whitney, and Kim mugging for the camera. Jenna, who reminded me of the 1980s exercise fanatics from the cover of my mom's Jane Fonda aerobics records (yes, you read that correctly), was quite a hit with the laddies at the club we visited after the party wrapped up.

Casey, doing her best to cement the 'sexy teacher' image in every prepubescent boy's mind.

Hassan, ever the original, dressed as a businessman/suit/yuppie, and his lovely date, the toga-clad goddess, Meredith. Ladies, for future reference, never make a toga out of a bedsheet. I cannot count the number of times Mere and I had to run off to the ladies room to prevent her exposure at the club.

Tom, dressed as one of Glasgow's most beloved scholars, Lord Kelvin. Traffic cone hat added for accuracy.

Flat G and friends. Left to right, Hassan, first wench Elaine, Fr. Sylvain, naughty schoolgirl (as if there's any other kind) Priyanka, and Zein, sporting the ever-popular I'm-too-lazy-to-come-up-with-
a-costume-so-I'll-pop-in-some-fake-teeth-and-presto! look.

Kim, Mere, and myself. Kim's costume was quite possibly the most accurate representation of a chav (or a Glaswegian Ned) I've ever seen. Well, barring the real thing, that is. If only she'd had an infant swaddled in knock-off Burberry and a pack of smokes tucked into her brassiere...

Jenna's take on Olivia Newton-John and Dr. Joseph Lister, the father of antiseptic surgery and one of Glasgow's eminent, nineteenth-century faculty members, as played by J.

Lord Kelvin and Baron Lister, leading the group in a rousing acoustic version of Chamillionaire's recent hip-hop single, "Ridin'". The lyrics to The Mixtape Messiah's anthem can be found here. My goodness, how I abhor rap.

Ebony, our resident Kiwi (New Zealander), and J. I don't quite remember what exactly was going on here. I blame the punch for both my ignorance and their behavior. (And personal responsibility prepares to put its second foot in the grave...)

Hassan, Meredith, Jaehee (Yar, the tastiest wench ever to swab a poop deck, matey!), and your esteemed author, toasting the evening. Resist all urges to ask what libation is contained in our cups; you'll think less of me should you find out, and we can't have that, now can we?

Hope everyone had a safe and spooky Halloween. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming!